Powered by Bravenet Bravenet Blog

Tag Board

Aviarianna: ...Nevermind...goodness this thing is confusing sometimes
Aviarianna: Folks I do beleiv someone, AGAIN, has been masquerading as me on this tag bored becuase the last thing I and by that I mean Me, the one who actually wrote the journals, responded to was from Zilla Bloodfreak...
Aviarianna: Jihad I am not now, nor have I ever been friends with whoever that idiot was. I know how to play along and hey, disbeleiver deserved it. I havent been to the forum in a LONG time...but I suppose I could go check it out one last time...
Dhu'l-Jihad: Aviarianna, you don't know me but I know you. I have read your posts on the Vampire Church postboards. I see that you are a friend of that punk "Lestat de Lioncourt", *laughs out loud mockingly*. If you are in contact with that poser, tell him to go to the Vampire Church postboards and see what I have written. In fact, go there yourself and see what I have written and then relay the message to him. I will be awaiting his response, though I know he won't respond.
Chris: O the most beloved Avi, where are you? I haven't heard from you in aeons. Please e-mail me.
Chris: O belloved Avi, have you received my e-mails I re-sent? Hopefully so. Please e-mail me back. I miss corresponding with you.
Chris: Avi, I have resent the e-mails I sent you that you never received. Have you received them? Hopefully, I will hear back from you soon. I miss corresponding with you.
Chris: You didn't get my e-mails? I sent you two. I will try to resend them.
Aviarianna: Emails? I never got any emails...damn yahoo...I hate it sometimes. I'll let ya know when I'm on for more than 15 minutes, or am gonna be on for more than that. Till then hon!
Chris: Hey Avi, I guess we had a little miscommunication. I was expecting and awaiting you to respond to the e-mails I sent you. And when you didn't respond I was wondering if you didn't want to correspond. When it comes to computers, I am a little dense. How do I know when you're on?
Aviarianna: Chris, what in the nine hades of hell are you talking about???? I keep expecting You to talk to Me, if I show as online, feel more than free to talk to me!
Chris: Avi, is your computer being persnickety again or do you not want to correspond with me anymore?
Go Carts: My name is Jesse and I am 12 years old. I found your site through the search and would like to ask you to visit my indoor go cart racing blog in return thank you http://www.indoorgocartracing.com
Lord Zillah Bloodfreak: O beloved Aviarianna, I haven't heard back from you. I hope that everything is alright with you. I will be awaiting your e-mail.
Lord Zillah Bloodfreak: I am sorry to hear that you've been feeling ill. I hope that you are feeling better. I assume that you and your sister do not get along?
Aviarianna: I've been very busy and slightly ill. My sister...has had to move back in with us and it's not doing me any good.
Lord Zillah Bloodfreak: O beloved Aviarianna, where are you? You haven't responded to my e-mails.
Aviarianna: Thank You! I got the lj one!
Ayesha: ooops didn't work.. will try leaving it for you in lj... see ya .. sorry for the miss tag..
Ayesha: Here is something that I made.. enjoy.. I have others too.. but here you go..http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v702/Ayeshalee1/h.jpg
Aviarianna: You seem to have figured it out on your own.
Lord Zillah Bloodfreak: What is your e-mail address, O Beloved Avi?
Aviarianna: You want to talk? Email me then.
Lord Zillah Bloodfreak: So Ville is that effeminate, scrawny, androgynous, pretty boy's name? Oh, isn't he so sensitive and precious! Oh no, the Bloodfreak just insulted Ville in your presence! What ever are you going to do? You need a real man, like the Bloodfreak!
Aviarianna: Bloodfreak, I will not argue with youy over my tag board. If you want to talk to me, email me. But understand this, the only thing I know about you is how annoying and arrogant and pompous you happen to be on that forum. And do not EVER insult Ville in my presence!
Anonymous: boy*
Lord Zillah Bloodfreak: O Beloved Avi, is that type of guy you like, the one in the pictures here - the effeminate, scrawny, androgynous pretty buy pansy?
Lord Zillah Bloodfreak: O Beloved Avi, you do not know what you are saying. Your Destiny is with the Bloodfreak! Embrace your Destiny! Bloodfreak!
Aviarianna: Listen bloodfreak, I havnt been on the forum in at least a month and have no interest in you. None. Leave me alone.
Lord Zillah Bloodfreak: O beloved Avi, where are you? Your Destiny is with the Bloodfreak! Embrace your Destiny! E-mail me (lordzillahbloodfreak@yahoo.com) Do you have any pics?
Aviarianna: I know Ayesha...I couldnt help it. There is just something...but oh well. So far I'm just nutz about the music and hey, Ville makes a good background no? lol.
Ayesha: Avi, you have gone Ville Valo crazy..hehehe.. wow what a change in such a short time.. I like HIM, and use some icons that I have made,, but dear this is going a little over..lol.. hugs
LordZillahBloodfreak: O beloved Avi, e-mail the Bloodfreak! Do you have any pics?
Lord Zillah Bloodfreak: O beloved Avi, where are you? Your destiny is with the Bloodfreak! Embrace your destiny!
Aviarianna: Tis HIM/VILLE-fied! TADA!
Aviarianna: Thank you very much, I do try. :)
Syd: You're a very talented writer. Hopefully you'll take advantage of your gift and appy it to something you find important. Keep it up
Aviarianna: It's not your fault. And your appology is accepted in full. I am afraid I do not have aim but if you would like to email me, just click on my name.
Amanda: *after reading entries* I am so sorry for anything you have ever been put through. I do not apologize for anything that I have done to you, because I do not know you personally, but instead, I apologize on behalf of the rest of the human (my) race. Nobody deserves to suffer as we have caused so many others to suffer. If you wish to contact me, my AIM is healxthesexscars. I would look forward to speaking with you.
Amanda: You are very welcome.
Aviarianna: My actions are based off the actions of my so called friends, whom I do not consider friends anymore. You are sad? Join the club .
Sad: sad and angry by your actions and that of your so called friends
Aviarianna: Thanks...to both Aiden and Amanda.
Aidan: Wow you have a nice place here!
Amanda: I was just journal-browsing and I found yours. I love it. :) I know that feeling you explained in your last post - the understanding one -, too much in fact
Ayesha: smiles and hugs...
Aviarianna: You are forgiven. I'm no stranger to that kind of treatment, you were defensive, it's okay.
Ayesha: I am sorry, forgive me.. I am never that mean,, I don't know what came over me.. hugs, hugs again
Aviarianna: Ah, Ayesha! that wasnt a very nice trick...lol. But oh well.
Eye: I will give you a clue, I am also sweet and rarely mad, I like to play, but hope I didn't make you sad. I have friends that are in a garden, and we play and chat. I am mortal, and told you somethings..LOL, I am also the queen of typo and the first part of my name is like Eye, but with an A.. hugs and forgive me,, I am not normally this way. When you firt join the Glass, well I was an ass. Hugs and kisses.. from someone named Lee..
Aviarianna: At the moment I'm too tired to even guess. So please...enlightenme cuase plenty of ppl hug me...

Please type in the four characters shown in the black box.

Saturday, November 5th 2005

11:29 AM

Weeping Willow

  • I Feel... sick, sleepy, ugh...
  • I am submersed in: HIM: Under The Rose
(Originally posted in LJ on November 1st 2005)
 
This entry has nothing to do with willow's or weeping, but the title fits none the less.

Long time no see journal of mine...I'd hate to have whoever actually reads this feel that I have abandoned it. No...I have not left it but my days of entering rants and raves come few and far in between.

The gates to the garden are closed, perhaps for good but we all know well and good that the garden is unpredictable and may open up once more years after this moment in time. Let it remain a secret garden for future generations to discover, hm? Let them bask in the complex simplicity of the illusionary magesty that the Glass was, is and forever will be for none of us will forget it.

For what it's worth...it was worth every trial and tribulation, every insult and every good laugh, every betrayel and every renewal that went on in the savage garden.

We all learned a great many things about eachother, the world, and life.

Today is the first day of november, In my calander it is the first day of the new year for I am wiccan and Samhain is my new year. Yes, I trick or treated, yes I spent it with my friend, yes we stayed up late watching scary movies, and yes...I toasted the new year albeit was with orange juice instead of wine or cider. But I use what I can get my hands on. Today...is the first day of the rest of my life....

I am just as confused as I was a year ago. It is laughable...really. I've gotten answers and I've gotten cold shoulders. There is a council who supposedly finally made a decision and I KNOW something happened last night but for the life of me I can't remember what the hell happened between me turing off the television aroundn 2 am and when I woke up around 10 this morning. I know that something changed....something drasticly changed...

All we can do is wait.

Why does it seem that the shit really hit the fan in the Garden after Andrew and I became scarce there...? Honestly...tell me why, please.

And please...do not leave me again. I do not think I could take that...but hey, it's up to you is it not?

You know...my memories still hurt so much. I won't even talk to Willy about them...and I trust the man completely. I just don't think that telling him about a bloody past would do much good for the relasionship we have. I've seen his reactions to other...surprises...and this would probably scare him out of geniously insane wits. I know it still scares me that I've even got such lucid images in my minds eye.

The blood is there, still. My fingers seem to be stained with it, and I'm not joking, the palms of my hands are a bit redder than they should be. I can still smell it, I can almost feel it's warmth, blood all over my hands...

See...it's horrifying these images, these lucid waking dreams, but glorious at the same exact time and I've no idea what to make of half the time.

I scare myself.

So as I sit here now, sucking on a grape Dum Dum lollipop becuase the flu mist is making me sick and I do not feel like getting up to rattle through our cabinets looking for cough syrup that tastes like a permenant marker smells, or cough drops that are so old they have melted to there wrappers, I wonder. The most depressing and wandering of thoughts are here.

I wonder if I'll ever get to really tell them that I'm sorry...

I wonder if I'll ever get to appologize to Nikolai for the horrible mix ups cuased by that imcompetent, fatuous, slimeball of a being dwayne, for it almost cuased me to kill someone that I care about.

I wonder if I'll ever get to see Nikolas again...I loved him even if wasn't for too long a time...

I wonder if I'll ever get to see Kristopher again and ask him why he broke us up in such a way...why he betrayed his brother just so that Nikolas and I wouldnt be together anymore..

My old friends...will I ever get to see you again?

Whem are we leaving oh most respected members of the fae council?

When are Jareth and I going to resolve these issues between us...I miss him dearly...and I want to appologize for anything and everything if that will make it all better!

I just want things to be okay again...if thats even possible.

So is it? Can we make everything okay again? Please?

Don't leave me like this...-sigh-

Please...someone tell me that it's going to be okay without lying.


Much love

~Aviarianna~
0 Dare To Dream.

There are no comments to this entry.

Post New Comment

 BraveJournal Member Non-Member
No Smilies More Smilies »
Please type the letters you see